For The Ones You Love
by ThePurpleRose
Summary: Pronyma always knew more that she was letting on, but when she and Yuan are the first to reach the scene of Anna's death, a huge secret is revealed to her in the form of a certain little boy. What could persuade her to keep it to herself?
1. Discovery

**AN: I'm clearing out stuff I've started but not finished, so here's a little ficlet on Anna's death. Will most likely turn into a fic of little ficlets... I know what I mean. Words fail me today... But anyway, it hit me that Pronyma was a spy so she probably would've known most of what was going on, and Yuan is hardly the type not to have looked for Lloyd... So yeah...**

_**Disclaimer: I don't own ToS; I only wish I did.**_

_Blood... Stains... Everywhere... Screams... Pain... Blood... Everywhere... Crying... Pain... Run... Run! Run! Save... Must save... Save... help..._

Yuan gasped, doubling over as his stomach lurched. A high keening noise momentarily deafened him and his vision blurred dangerously.

"Lord Yuan! My lord, what's wrong?" a feminine voice panicked.

Nails brushed his arm and his vision sharpened, the pain disappearing as the noise stopped. He straightened, fixing an impassive, stern gaze upon the scantily clad, green haired woman, whose eyes bled false concern.

"It was nothing, Pronyma," he assured her in an authoritative tone. "We must hurry to the temple. We need to set up the altar before the Chosen's induction ceremony while it's still light or we will be seen by the night watch."

It wasn't nothing. Dread rose within the ancient warrior with each step he took. His heart pounded. He wanted to run, though he wasn't sure why. But there was no logical reason for this. Logic dictated that all was as well as could be while Mithos held the power, and Yuan lived by logic. Logically he had nothing to worry about except Pronyma, who still believed she could win his affection and gain access to Mithos that way, and who he was certain he could annihilate if she ever changed her mind. Nothing was out of the ordinary.

_Run! Run run save must save... help... get help... Lloyd... get Lloyd, Noishe get Lloyd. No, help... get help... not get Lloyd... get help... Help Kratos... Save boy... Save Kratos. Run! Run!_

"My lord, a monster!" Pronyma shrieked, readying the throwing disk she carried when in the guise of a traveller.

Yuan's eyes snapped to the approaching beast as their owner cursed his lack of concentration then briefly relaxed.

"Noishe!" he exclaimed. "Put your weapon away, Pronyma."

He knelt to the ground as the speeding protozoan skidded to a halt, panting heavily, eyes wide and fearful. A desperate whine was emitted, Yuan's growing smile freezing then fading into a frown, his heart rate rising as Noishe whined, growled and set off the way he had come with a sharp tug on the end of Yuan's travelling cape.

"He wants us to follow him," the elder half-elf relayed, his tone indicating that Pronyma shouldn't argue.

She didn't, instead gasping for air as she followed the much fitter man, running through the trees around the village of oracles at breakneck speeds. She didn't understand. She thought Yuan was insane. But she wasn't about to lose her ticket to Lord Yggdrasil's most trusted minions. She'd spent two years working under this man and progress had been slow but she was finally making it, finally decreasing the dislike that clouded his judgement of her. She didn't ask questions. She just worked.

The vile stench of fresh blood hit the back of her throat, causing her to stumble as she caught sight of the Desian corpses littering the ground, but she kept her footing, and her pace, and caught up with her superior as he halted by an image of destruction. Trees had fallen in a heap as though giants had been bowling with boulders, rocks from the cliff side holding them in place. It was here the half-elf and the protozoan had stopped, the colour draining from Yuan's face as horror took it over.

It wasn't until Pronyma reached them that she saw why.

There, trapped under a boulder and two trees, was a person.

And not just any person.

_Him_.

"No," Yuan breathed, launching himself into the debris and heaving aside some branches until he could reach an outstretched hand. "Kratos! Hey, Kratos!"

Pronyma ventured closer to the spectacle, just catching the echoes of a dying voice.

"Yu-an," it coughed, taking in a deep, shuddering breath. "You... find Lloyd for me... Please, promise... find... Lloyd. Please... Yu..."

"Yeah, I'll find him," Yuan agreed desperately, grasping the hand in his own as he pressed his shoulder against the tree trunk, pushing his weight against it. "But I've got to get you out now."

"No... Find Lloyd... Go... to Lloyd... Please... Please... Yu-" the man broke off into a hacking, wet cough, which subsided into a pained, weak wheeze.

"You hang on in there, human," Yuan ordered, dropping the hand and throwing his entire body into the log. It moved but barely, the half-elven hero cursing and frantically shoving at it.

"... Lloyd..." came a hoarse whisper. "Please... Lloyd..."

"Alright, alright!" Yuan snapped. "Noishe, will you find Lloyd and look after him until I get to you, please?"

Pronyma watched as the green and white beast obeyed the command of her superior. He would trust a monster over her?

"My lord, is there anything I can do to help?" she enquired pleasantly. She _would_ get something out of this situation. She would make sure of it.

"We need to move this," he puzzled. "How?" He snapped his fingers. "Pronyma, do you have that ring armour you usually wear in that wing pack?"

"Yes, my lord?" she answered tentatively.

Determination darkened his eyes. "Good, give it to me."

She hesitated.

"Now!" he snapped.

She moved, thrusting it into his open arms. Her eyes widened in shock as he violently rammed it between the tree trunk and the other tree trunk and forced his weight onto it again and again until it rolled further down, exposing the twisted torso of the barely conscious human he was trying so hard to save.

Instead of elation at the success, the lightning mage swore. "The rubble of this boulder and the other tree are crushing him. If we move either one of them, this rock will fall and he'll be killed." Yuan clenched his hands into fists. "There's no other way. Pronyma, contact Mi- Lord Yggdrasil and tell him I need healers and a rescue team. Tell him..." He trailed off, shaking his head in disgust before continuing with a resigned sigh, "Tell him I've found Kratos."

She obeyed without question, storing them for the second communication closed and it was just them. She turned, seeing that Yuan had climbed into the rubble with the human traitor and was holding his only exposed hand while stroking his dusty, bloody hair and whispering softly.

"Lord Yuan," she began, approaching them.

Yuan looked up, the words dying in Pronyma's throat as their eyes met. He suddenly looked older than the Kharlan war, older than Derris-Kharlan, and twice as betrayed, twice as hurt, twice as afraid.

"Why?" she managed.

Yuan's eyes left hers, a low noise escaping his throat as he turned his attention back to the fading human, the deep welts across his chest and the grey tint to his cooling skin as Kratos' eyes rolled into the back off his head. He shook the human, but his eyes remained firmly closed, his only movement being his laboured breathing and the oozing of blood from his wounds into the surrounding ground.

"That's a very good question, Pronyma," he answered, quietly, thoughtfully. His emerald green eyes flickered from his ancient companion to his more recent underling, though his hands remained caressing the human's hair and squeezing his limp hand. "In fact, it's more than one question in just one word. Well done."

Pronyma was surprised to find that his eyes weren't mocking as they usually were whenever he praised her, nor were they disliking. They were still harsh, but they were harsh with rage that seemed to simmer within, but not for her, and with revulsion.

"I can sum up the answers to all of them in one too, if you'd like," he continued.

His eyes had taken on a softer note now. She could see love that wasn't for her and regret that couldn't be hers either. But it was more complex emotion than she had ever elicited from him. More than he had ever directed at her.

He looked her directly in the eye now, his expression serious, sombre. "Pronyma, people will do anything for the ones they love, be they your child, your parent, your husband, wife, brother or sister. Even if it means losing them, even if it causes them pain. Even if you know they won't like it, if it helps them in the end, if it keeps them alive or saves them grief and suffering in the long run, you'll do it. No matter what the consequences are for you, you'll do it. Remember that, Pronyma. Sometimes, to save the ones you love, even if all you can save is their soul, you have to hurt them. It's ridiculous but that's life. Don't forget it."

Pronyma was taken aback. She knew she'd just been given a piece of advice. She knew it was the answer to an important question, but she didn't know what he was referring to. It was obvious he cared for the traitor and that he hadn't wanted to hand him over to their noble leader to save him punishment but he had done so to save the life of the inferior being, but why did she feel there was more to the situation?

Yuan hadn't waited for an answer. His eyes were glued to the human's face. He brushed the blood-soaked hair from the other man's pale forehead despite the thin sheen of sweat across it. It was such a gentle movement.

The half-elf was now mumbling again, prompting Pronyma to venture closer, entranced. Yuan was not a gentle man. He did not strike her as kind. Rather, he was harsh, cold and calculating. He lived for logic and revelled in machinery and mathematics. He seemed to dislike people and their noise and chaos.

And here he was, promising a traitorous, wretched, inferior creature that he would be alright and softly singing the remnants of a long forgotten lullaby as he held his hand and stroked his hair.

"That monster hasn't come back yet," she observed awkwardly, anything to distract herself from the strange behaviour of her fellow half-elf. "Do you think he found this 'Lloyd'?"

"It is likely," was the terse response. "But we won't be finding out."

"You just said you'd find it," Pronyma pointed out.

Yuan fixed her with a stern stare, which actually cause her to relax a little. This was the man she knew, calm, logical, terrifying. "I said that Noishe would. And I told Noishe to look after the boy until I get to him. I will not be responsible for bringing the horrors of Cruxis onto that little boy. I won't be getting to him until it is truly safe to do so."

"The horrors?" Pronyma questioned, incredulously, shocked to find her lord use such treacherous language.

"It isn't the place for a child," he stated firmly. "Innocents should be allowed to remain so, outside of any negative influences."

Pronyma frowned. What was he saying? Cruxis were striving for a new world, an age of half-elves, an age of glory. What child would not wish for a world without discrimination? "Lord Yuan, what are you saying?"

Yuan did not respond directly. He merely awarded her a small, sad, knowing smile that made her stomach sink with some soul-known secret that she had yet to realise she was aware of, before observing, "Our help has arrived."

Angels descended from the stormy sky, a pair of rainbow wings casting prisms of light among them and the three below through the fat, angry droplets of rain as they began to fall. Awed by the sight, Pronyma simply stared, removing herself from the bustle around the fallen human before Yuan reached her and they pressed silently onto the temple, where the oracle would be delivered.

She hadn't the time to dwell on their exchange and thought of it no more until she was summoned to report directly back to the leader, until she was removed from her duties by Yuan's side.

Her hand shook as she held the summons, unsure of what it was telling her, unsure of her fate when she accepted the request. It simply stated that she was to be removed from her current post and that she should report to the throne room for an audience with the leader. She was undeniably nervous; what if she had done wrong? Would she lose the privilege of striving for the promised age of half-elves?

She reached the throne room, wringing her hands before she made what she hoped would be a confident yet respectful knock and received the order to enter in a regal tone. The door was a giant, heavy structure, which opened magically as she gave it a single push to reveal a large chamber and a man dressed in white and gold, arranged elegantly on his fitting, grand throne.

Pronyma fell to her knees less than half-way to this wonderful being.

"Come, Pronyma," he encouraged with a smile and an outstretched hand from his position above and beyond her. "Come closer; I have heard great things about you."

Pronyma obeyed, her head bowed as she scurried to the foot of the steps that led to her leader, her idol. So this was why she had been summoned. Lord Yuan had submitted his report. She wasn't sure if she dared to hope for a promotion.

"I will be frank with you, Pronyma," the leader stated, beckoning to her to lift her head as he leaned forwards in his seat. "In light of the reports regarding you that I have received from Yuan, I would like to offer you the post of Grand Cardinal."

Pronyma gasped. A Grand Cardinal? Her? She knew the old leader of the Grand Cardinals had died but for her to take over his ranch, it was more than she could ever have dreamed. She was just a low ranked Desian, chosen to help Lord Yuan simply for her expertise with the darkness element and lack of physical talent. He had improved that aspect of her greatly but she was still far from good.

"My lord?"

He chuckled, a deep rumble that echoed from his throat throughout the chamber. "Don't act so surprised Pronyma. I know your physical statistics are less than impressive, but Magnius already occupies a Cardinal's seat based on physical attacks. When recruiting someone to be the leader of the Grand Cardinals, I look for a more logical mind and somebody loyal to our cause. Congratulations, Pronyma. You are the new leader of the Grand Cardinals."

"Th-thank you, my lord," she stuttered. "I will not let you down, I promise you, si- my lord."

He was chuckling again, leaning back on his throne. "Now, before you leave to pack your belongings – I will send an envoy to take you to your ranch tomorrow to give you ample time to sort out what you wish to take with you – I have an enquiry to make of you."

"Yes, my lord?" Pronyma agreed, curiosity creeping into her tone as she tried to quell the shaking her body was doing in excitement for her new role.

He lifted a hand, resting his elbow on the arm of the throne and the side of his face on the back of his fist in a refined pose. "Regarding the retrieval of Kratos, Pronyma, you were with Yuan when he was found, yes?"

"Yes, my lord," she confirmed.

"Kvar tells me that the woman, A012, was killed by Kratos. Is this correct?" he questioned.

Pronyma's eyes dropped to the floor as she rubbed her palms together, flustered. "I do not know, my lord. Lord Yuan and I arrived to find Lord Kratos trapped and Desians dead, but we did not see a human woman among the dead, as far as I am aware, my lord."

"A012 had been turned into an exbelua," he revealed. "But you would recall seeing her. She was at the bottom of the cliff on inspection. I was simply curious of how she got there. Kvar also told me that Kratos killed A012 to save the child they spawned, but this child, a brown haired boy dressed in red, was not found when the area was searched. Yuan's report said nothing about the child, but, Pronyma, I don't suppose you heard anything about the child? Anything that could help Cruxis to find this boy could be useful, Pronyma."

He had lifted his head to look her directly in the eye. The eyes were steely and calculating, ire burning beneath the calm exterior. Pronyma had always been good at reading eyes. She had been about to reveal all to this amazing, magnificent being, whose goal was to bring to the world the ultimate peace, the ultimate freedom. She had thought to help him to bring this child into the fantastic world that Cruxis could provide, to grow to help them create it.

But something in those eyes made her pause. On the surface, they were like Yuan's – the eyes of someone who had experienced too much of the world, someone clever, brave, skilled and logical – but beneath it all, they were something else entirely. He had told her that Kratos Aurion had killed the mother of his child to save that little boy. She had been there. He had wanted to throw away his own life. He had begged his rescuers to find his son until he had been unable to say anything more. If that wasn't the love that Yuan had spoken of, what was?

And the leader, her lord's eyes told her that he considered this trivial, that rage simmered within him. She believed Cruxis was the saviour of the world, a wondrous thing, but Yuan's eyes had been so sincere. He clearly believed that the traitor's child would do better away from the organisation.

Pronyma looked up at the falsely caring gaze that bored into her own and said, "No, my lord."

And as Lord Yggdrasill's frown revealed his displeasure at these words and he coldly dismissed her, she knew she had made the right decision.

**AN: I think I'll continue this. I have a couple of ideas so this may turn into a bit of a collection exploring Pronyma's role in the game and her relationship with Yuan (not in that way).**

**Any reviews would make me smile – constructive criticism is also always accepted and taken into account.**

**Thanks for reading! ^_^**

**~ThePurpleRose**


	2. Information

**AN: Here's the second instalment. I wrote the section that is being posted now back in May, while I was insanely busy. I have proof read it but there will most likely still be typos. If you spot any you'd like me to correct, please let me know and I will fix them. I don't bite. Much. ;)**

**As a couple of you will possibly already know – this chapter was originally 8,000 words long in a not-quite-finished state but I figured that was way too long for a chapter to be so I have split it in two. However, this means that the scene with Yggdrasill that I had so much fun writing has been cut from this chapter and that makes Pronyma lean very far to Yuan. Please bear with that and remember Pronyma's loyalty to Yggdrasill, which will be highlighted next chapter.**

**But this chapter is now only 4,000 words and much more readable. But we are now lacking the action of the summons to Yggdrasill so please remember that this was once half a chapter and is therefore quite slow moving. I hope you'll bear with it. I feel the Yggdrasill scene should be worth it.**

**I hope you enjoy! **

**EDIT: 10/09/11. Changed a lot of the chapter to improve Pronyma's reaction and get rid of some drivel.**

**NOTE: I said I would update this with the second part on Tuesday but this is looking less likely as news of the weather in the UK has come in. I don't need to tell you that this could cause problems. So I might be able to update then but I might not. I will update as quickly as possible though.**

**And now, my very long AN is over.**

_**Disclaimer: I don't own ToS. If I did, we'd be seeing much more of Yuan and his cape.**_

Pronyma's shoes made no sound as she crept down the corridor of Vinheim's lower level, relying on the light of the torches on the walls to guide her to her destination. She was calm for once, Vinheim's effect on her lessening with each visit she made to its lower reaches. But then, she wasn't there to see Lord Yggdrasill this time; she'd already been that day and she knew her lord was in the seed chamber visiting Goddess Martel this evening.

She was surprised to find that the door she was looking for was open and even more so to find the man she was looking for already turned around in his chair to watch her silently ask for an invitation to enter.

"You got careless, Pronyma," he reported, waving her in. "I heard you warp in. Close the door behind you if you're planning on staying."

Pronyma obeyed the order, settling into the chair that had so far been used only by her, in the corner of the room. Yuan sat in the one opposite her, by the head of the unconscious human in the bed. Occasionally, he'd brush back the auburn hair that stubbornly returned to shade his face, but mostly, he simply sat vigil, holding a limp hand in his, running a thumb along it at intervals as if to remind the human he was still there, even if Kratos didn't have any knowledge of it.

They sat in silence for a couple of minutes, Yuan rearranging the sheets around the traitor as Pronyma looked on, feeling more at ease just by being in the presence of the man who was once her immediate superior. The lifeless beings made her feel on edge for some reason, even if she knew full well that everyone becoming the same ultimate building would help to create the ultimate future for her kind. It was their soulless eyes. It was as if they were dead inside already, and, truly, they were. For her, it was like living in a morgue. Even the presence of a man she was unable to decipher was better than the presence of those in which there was nothing to decipher.

"You came to see me, Pronyma," he said, giving the hand in his a slight squeeze as he turned to regard her with a calculating gaze. "I assume you have come for a reason; to what do I owe the pleasure?"

Despite the cold sarcasm, there was a softness to his eyes, like he was simply teasing her rather than mocking with malice. "No, no reason, my lord," she replied, toying with the edge of her ring armour with one hand. She wasn't lying. Nobody had sent her here.

"Oh?" he prompted, one blue eyebrow rising into his hair.

"I was merely looking for something to do since Lord Yggdrasill decommissioned my ranch," she elaborated, dropping her gaze from his to the human behind him.

She knew he was studying her and she didn't have any doubts that Yuan would be better at reading eyes than even she was. She didn't want all of her secrets known to him; it wouldn't do to give him even more power over her than he already had. She'd worked hard for the little power she had been given and losing her ranch didn't mean that she was willing to lose her position without a fight. She couldn't afford to be careless anymore – not when she was afraid that the slightest hint of weakness could demote her to an ordinary Desian.

"Ah yes," he replied, a hint of a smile appearing on his tired face. "I had heard your ranch was to be taken apart. It upsets you, doesn't it?"

Pronyma's eyes widened. "N-no, my lord," she shot back before any doubts could form, "I respect Lord Yggdrasill's wishes always, my lord! His is the will that will create the new world."

A rumble of nearly cynical laughter erupted from her superior. "If it makes you feel any better, I happen to know why that ranch was decommissioned. The area wasn't a prime location; there were too many attacks by the Renegades; and M- Yggdrasill wanted to make use of you in other areas. It is nothing you've done, Pronyma. We're all well aware that you've only been in charge of the ranch for two weeks – not nearly enough time to make a difference to the way it's run."

"Why do you do that?" she enquired, leaning back in her seat, only to realise that her armour was preventing her from taking any comfort in the gesture.

"Do what? Tell you the truth?" he questioned, something in his eyes letting her know he was well aware that wasn't what she was asking, testing her daring to actually ask what was sure to be a personal question.

"You always start to call Lord Yggdrasill by his first name then use his surname without the honorific," Pronyma elaborated. "Why do you do that?"

She didn't add that it seemed disrespectful. Lord Yggdrasill trusted his two former companions enough to allow them to use his true name. It seemed only right for that offer to be taken up, simply to display the loyalty and affection that was required as a subordinate of their amazing leader. Without his title, the use of his last name seemed almost rude, counterproductive to rising through the ranks, certainly. Pronyma wondered if Yuan truly cared so little about his position, or if he was really that confident of its stability.

"You always ask the right questions, Pronyma," he observed before resuming darkly, "I have many reasons. You've probably worked out several. It's a slip of the tongue, nothing more. Mithos the hero is a legend only, Pronyma. He's only a name in a text book, an idol for people to aspire to. Yggdrasill is our leader now. The two are entirely different. Mithos is simply Yggdrasill's final link to the boy he once was and the world below."

Yuan's gaze was sharp and harsh. He looked her directly in the eye as if challenging her to contradict him, or to scamper off to Lord Yggdrasill so she could hide behind his formidable figure. She did neither, only staring at the higher being before her as though he was like nothing she had ever seen and she couldn't figure out what he was.

She thought Yuan was a great person. He was no Lord Yggdrasill, no Mithos the Hero, but he was a hero in his own right, a true genius working towards the goal of a peaceful world. She knew he was on her side. She trusted her superior. She'd seen the sincerity and determination in his gaze when he spoke to her of this goal. She couldn't doubt him now, after all he'd taught her.

And yet, there was an edge to his voice, an edge that told her how little he respected their leader. He was bitter almost, scathing. Pronyma had heard that edge before and it was always present when he spoke of Lord Yggdrasill, always crept in whenever Cruxis was directly mentioned. The last time she'd heard it had been that day.

Pronyma broke the eye-contact. "Have you heard anything about the child?" she enquired, gesturing behind Yuan to the figure on the bed.

Yuan shook his head, a slow, gratified smile on his face, his eyes softening towards her. Towards _her_. Not something she'd said; he was really praising her. Against her wishes, Pronyma felt herself swell with pride. She didn't know why; Yuan was no longer her immediate superior. He wouldn't file any more reports on her, so it no longer mattered how he thought of her. Then why did she still want his approval?

"No," he replied, still smiling. "Lloyd is still at large."

"And... Lord Kratos?" she pushed, her own small smile growing.

Yuan flinched, his face falling back into a serious semblance of coldness. "Kratos should wake up soon. The healers have done the best they can."

He smoothed back the man's hair again then turned back to her with a trying expression. "Pronyma, how is your spying coming along?"

Pronyma stiffened, startled by the sudden, blunt interrogation. "W-wha-" she stuttered.

A low chuckle rumbled momentarily in the elder half-elf's throat. "You thought it was a secret," he concluded, smiling smugly. "No doubt Yggdrasill told you so. You are to keep this assignment secret from me too. Am I correct?"

Pronyma's eyes were wide with shock at how quickly he had figured this out. She had only been assigned the role a couple of days ago – a position of true trust between only her and her lord, the chance to prove her worth and earn a place and Lord Yggdrasill's side, all she could possibly want. It was a secret between herself and the most magnificent being she could imagine, and yet, Yuan had already found this out. He truly was her superior. Pronyma had never been so certain of who was deserving of her respect.

Yuan laughed darkly. "I can tell from your face; you don't have to answer me. I would like to give you some advice."

Her blush darkened. He had seen right through her. And even now, he held some kind of strange power over her. She was even leaning forward in her seat to be closer to him, as if this alone could prompt him to give up all his secrets or better yet, to trust her with them. He had her wrapped around his little finger. He could probably use her for anything and she would submit to his will, she knew it. And, most likely, so did he. But she knew he wouldn't and that was why he was so deserving of respect. Because even though he wasn't their heroic leader, he was someone she felt she could trust against her suspicious nature and he never failed to intrigue her.

"I'm listening," she managed to affirm to the man who had been patiently watching her face.

He nodded once in approval then leaned backwards into the back of the chair, into a surprisingly relaxed posture, the most relaxed he had seemed in her presence before. "Then I'll speak," he responded with a small smile. "M-Yggdrasill is not a mind reader. He isn't omniscient nor is he omnipotent. He will send you places that he himself cannot see or reach. You don't have to tell him everything. He doesn't know everything. He was a half-elf too once; he makes mistakes. If you think he will make one with whatever information you've come across, you shouldn't feel pressured to give it to him. Remember what I told you that day. Remember Lloyd."

Yet again, he was telling her something that could be considered treason against Lord Yggdrasill. And again, she trusted him to be right. She believed him. She knew she shouldn't. She knew her lord would be displeased but she couldn't help it. Preventing someone from making a mistake wasn't wrong after all, was it? Technically, if she listened to Yuan's advice, she would be protecting their leader, stopping him doing something he would later regret. But then, who was she to judge for Lord Yggdrasill if he would make the right choice? He was her leader, her lord, her hero. She should be able to trust him to always make the right choice. She did trust him.

However, she still trusted Yuan and she believed he was right too. He was still so sincere and his eyes – there was so much to read in those eyes. He was always so sad, but he was also honest just then, she could see it, and his eyes were urging her. It was as if he was expecting her to make a very important decision and wanted to ensure she would make the right one. It was as if he truly cared.

He wasn't the indifferent, irritated, intelligent man who had once supervised her anymore. Yet, she didn't know when this change had occurred. Now he was a reserve of strength, someone who both picked her up and supported her when she felt weak and vulnerable, and made her feel like a small child involved in something beyond mortal comprehension in the big, bad world at the same time. Now he was like a true hero, instead of just the broken, dulled remains of one. Now he was more like her leader, her lord. And surely that was wrong.

And yet, it didn't feel wrong. It didn't feel wrong at all. It felt like this was truly the right path and anything else was just a detour, but she wasn't sure yet, she had no idea where this path even was or why she was even on it. Yuan was nothing like Lord Yggdrasill. He was calmer. He was more stable. He seemed safer, yet at the same time more dangerous for her to be around. But what she couldn't deny was that he seemed to care about her as an individual a whole lot more than their leader did.

And the proof of this fundamental difference was obvious. The evidence was everywhere. Did it really matter though? Yuan was once her immediate superior. He had been working closely with her for over two years now. Of course he was more personable towards her.

Whereas Lord Yggdrasill she had only just met. Lord Yggdrasill had been with his two closest subordinates for thousands of years. Lord Yggdrasill had thousands of subordinates just like her and had been through ten times as many again over the course of Cruxis' reign. She was nothing special to him. She would have to earn his respect, earn his trust and hopefully his affection.

Pronyma stood. Yuan had returned his attention to the human on the bed, smoothing the sheets around his prone form with a grim expression. It was clear to her that the conversation was over. He didn't look at her until she was stood in the doorway and even then it was a quick glance over his shoulder, an emotionless mask and the words, "Remember what I said, Pronyma."

Then he was more interested in the sheets again and she was leaving. It wasn't a definite warmth but it was a goodbye of sorts. It showed that he had actually cared about their conversation and what she would take away from it. And the option to stay had been there. Lord Yggdrasill always ordered her to leave, even as the coldness, the complete lack of any warmth or fondness, gave her chills and implanted the idea of escape in her head anyway.

His cold power both thrilled and terrified her. While he spoke to her, while he bestowed his attention on her, it thrilled her but the moment he grew tired of her, the moment he had finished what he wanted to say, her heart would pound faster and faster until she was sure he could hear it too and she found she couldn't leave fast enough.

She stopped at the warp pad that would take her back to Welgaia, giving her head a shake. Why was she even bothering to analyse them? They were both superior beings. They were the ultimate beings. She was just a half-elf, just a Desian, just one of the many beings they had laboured many more lifetimes than her own to save. They were going to be around long after her mortal lifespan had expired. She wouldn't be able to understand them until she held a level of power close to theirs and that time wasn't yet. But she vowed she would understand them. Someday.

With a sigh, Pronyma stepped onto the warp pad and returned to her new residence, rushing through the flying dolls along the way to avoid having to even think about their fate. This was for the good of the world. She had to accept that. It didn't matter that they gave her chills. It didn't matter that deep down the thought of being one of them terrified her. This was the way it had to be if discrimination was ever going to end. Everyone had to become the same. And as far as she knew, this was the only way. Besides, Lord Yggdrasill would not lead her down the wrong path. His will was the dream. The dream would be salvation.

Still, she was relieved when she finally shut herself inside her chambers, bare as they were, basic as they were. A glance at the clock told her that it was a late hour and therefore acceptable for her escape into sleep and finally be able to relax away from the eyes she sought to impress. She was finished for the day.

She herself to the mirror, removed her ring armour and her make-up, released her hair and stared at the woman who looked back at her. She had seen many different women in the mirror, some she liked, some she didn't. She'd seen the girl, the Desian wannabe, looking so innocent, so hopeful. She'd seen the beaten down woman she became with the ripped clothes, the bloody lip and the sad eyes in constant conflict. She'd seen the strong determined lady, full of fire and the desire to do something with her life, be somebody. Then she'd seen the leader of the Grand Cardinals, her face stern, her very demeanour proud and powerful.

Now she just saw Pronyma, her pale face bare, exposed to all, her shields long gone so she just looked tired. She ran a hand through her green hair, brushing it out of its usual style so that it fell around her face and shoulders. Then she moved away from the mirror and the woman whose face looked as though it didn't belong to a member of Cruxis, just to a woman living the eternal struggle of life, and changed out of her usual outfit and into her simple nightclothes, ready to curl up into a world where half-elves were respected.

That was when the knock at the door came.

Pronyma cursed, fervently hoping, though she didn't know why, that she was not being summoned to work so late though her sinking heart already thought the worst. Relatively slowly, like she was dragging herself out of bed and it was a great hassle to have a visitor, she moved to the door and pulled it open a tiny bit, hiding herself behind it so she couldn't even see who was there. It didn't bother her. She just didn't want them to be able to see her like this, like a real person who had weaknesses. She didn't want anyone here to see her as Just a Woman. She was Lady Pronyma. And she didn't look much like a formidable leader now.

"Yes?" she prompted coldly, hoping her tone would make up for her lack of physical presence.

The visitor pushed his way into the room, closing the door before the shocked Pronyma even had a chance to bristle about rude intrusion. With a sigh of impatience and irritation, Yuan pushed his hair back off his face and fixed his piercing green gaze on her own startled amber one. Before she could help herself, she had flushed embarrassed pink and could only stare unable to form a sentence, the big question in her head being 'Why?'.

Why was he there? He was in her room while she wasn't in her Cruxis costume. Yuan was in her chambers when he was supposed to be in Vinheim or his own. Closing her gaping mouth with a snap, Pronyma collected herself enough to blurt out, "You're with Lord Kratos."

"Yggdrasill thinks I am," he responded with a small chuckle, taking himself over to the table and chairs set she had that seated two. "I'd like it to stay that way."

She nodded attempting to regain some control over the situation. If there was one thing she hated nearly as much as discrimination against half elves, it was not being in control. She hated losing control, more even than being exposed as who she was. Her past had scarred her. Both of those things hadn't been too unthinkable as occurrences back then. And old habits died hard.

But she cleared her throat, put on the best mask of calm power she could without her make-up and asked in a voice that sounded as calm as she had hoped, "Can I get you a drink?"

He shook his head, his eyes clearly studying her again, and in her nightclothes, she felt self-conscious, vulnerable. Her pulsed raced under her skin. Yuan's clearly didn't. He was arranged almost casually on her wooden chair, leaning into its back. He looked as though he was content to simply be until she reached his face. There was something hard about the way his expression didn't betray any emotion. He was controlled. But his eyes were hard too, like he was sizing her up.

In her exposed state, this only encouraged her heart to beat faster. Usually, whatever challenge he posed to her, she met with determination, with a display that showed that while she might have been significantly less powerful than he was, she was still here and she would not give up on her goal. Now though, she wasn't sure if he was challenging her. She couldn't tell what he was thinking.

Finally, he spoke. "You look like a startled rabbit," he said with a small smile. Not a teasing smirk like he was toying with her but an actual smile and a tone that suggested it was an honest observation and he was pleased about it.

She frowned. She really didn't understand him in the slightest. And as things stood at the moment, she didn't like it. This was ridiculous! It was almost like she was afraid but of what? These were her rooms. This was her domain. She should have been the one with the power here. But she wasn't. Yuan was.

"I'm not Yggdrasill, you know," he commented at her restless gaze. He sounded at the same time reassuring and scathing. It did nothing to improve the situation for her, only highlighting how helpless and childlike she was compared to him.

"No," she agreed quietly, simply because she needed to hear her own voice and something she understood. He wasn't Lord Yggdrasill. He was completely different. But right now, he was scaring her just as much.

He nodded encouragingly. "It's late," he observed. "I won't take much of your time. You might have guessed this isn't a social visit. Why don't you sit down, Pronyma?"

It was phrased as a question and there was an element of choice in his tone but she still obeyed, taking the chair opposite him and watching expectantly. Her calm demeanour was coming more easily to her now she knew, at least in part, why he had come to her room. Or rather, a reason he had not come to her room.

"I'll be frank," he said, his eyes boring into her own. "You have impressed me, Pronyma. I cannot deny that I was not particularly thrilled to have you as my assistant in the beginning, but you have progressed. You're a talented woman. I have no doubt that you become the spy our _dear_ _leader_ is hoping for."

It was obvious now. Understanding dawned in Pronyma's eyes at the way he venomously spat those last words and in response, Yuan's eyes hardened. He paused only to draw breath but she didn't doubt he was watching her reaction and judging her on account of it.

"I want to give you the opportunity not to be," he finished.

He was truly observing her now, analysing her every move after this big revelation. And Pronyma didn't doubt that it was a big revelation. She just couldn't understand what it was. The opportunity to not be their leader's spy? The only way out of Cruxis and Lord Yggdrasill's control was death and she certainly wasn't keen on the idea of dying. Nor was she keen on leaving Cruxis or Lord Yggdrasill.

"I don't understand, my lord," she replied curiously yet nervously, as if she knew that what she said now would shape her destiny, the 'my lord' slipping in as soon as nerves touched her, as it always had, whether it was 'my lord', 'sir' or 'master'. Anything to salvage a situation.

"You know my goal," he described in an even tone. "I'm working for an end to discrimination. But for discrimination to end, this world needs to be removed from peril. There needs to be mana. The Desians only worsen the situation. It is the myth taught to people that makes the discrimination against half-elves so much worse. Sylvarant and Tethe'alla need to be reunited and the Desians must be abolished. That much is clear. This is the goal I strive for."

Fiery determination blazed in his emerald green eyes. He was only half looking at her now. She could tell he was still noting her actions and reactions but his eyes seemed far away, as though he was looking through her head into whatever it was that fuelled his passion for the goal. Then they snapped back to her, a smirk growing on his face.

"You are not the only one who can spy on people," he revealed. "The news of your secret duties as a spy is secret, between you and Yggdrasill. I should know nothing of it. That means that Yggdrasill is suspicious about me, or at least, as I suspect most, that he doesn't have faith in my abilities anymore. I would like you to spy for me. By spying, I mean that if you agree, I'd like you to tell me when you are given a task and the nature of that task."

She frowned but found herself leaning forwards in her chair for the second time that day. She wasn't averse to it. That shocked her. Then it shocked her that this entire situation wouldn't shock her. It was as clear as the sunniest of days to her that if anyone was worthy of her respect, of a high, powerful position, it was the man who looked at her with interest from across the table. After all, he had been her immediate superior and here he was, asking her to commit treason. That wasn't right. That wasn't how her world worked.

She turned her eyes to his, sensing amidst her confusion that there was more he had to say and hoping that it would be something that would put her day closer to being normal, put this conversation back into perspective for her.

"What I'm asking you," he declared, "is if you would join the Renegades."

**AN: There's the first part. The second part of this chapter – the new chapter three – will be now be up whenever I can get it uploaded, circumstances permitting. I hope you'll all like Yggdrasill's share of the limelight! It's not as clear cut for Pronyma as this chapter makes it seem.**

**Anyway, I hope you stick with this fic. I was gonna post you a little teaser of the next chapter here because it is for once nearly finished already but I don't want to spoil it for you or give you the wrong idea of things to come.**

**So yeah... Thanks very much to all my wonderful reviewers! You really make my day, inspire me to write and help me to improve my writing. As a guide, I don't block anonymous reviews and I am definitely open to constructive criticism. I am also open to 'hi's. ^_^**

**Until next chapter (hopefully),**

**~ThePurpleRose**


	3. Assignment

**AN: Chapter 3. Sorry it's so much later than originally planned. Luckily, my area didn't suffer too much with the weather caused by the remnants of Hurricaine Katia, which was downgraded to a tropical storm as it came into the UK, but other things, such as my Granddad's dementia and the fact that I move into university next Sunday have kind of got in the way and I haven't been able to finish and edit this chapter as I would've liked, so I withheld it until I had actually got the chapter to a finishing point I can deal with in the next one.**

**So yeah, that's my world. I hope you enjoy the new Chapter 3 that technically is the second half of chapter 2. And if you spot any typos or just generally bad bits I've missed, please feel free to let me know and I will fix them.**

**Oh, and ****Chapter 2 was been edited and re-uploaded, 10/09/11****! So if you're joining me here and read the last chapter before then you might want to check out previous chapter again because I got Pronyma a little too OOC and needed it pointed out to me before I could fix it. ^.^'**

_**Disclaimer: I still don't own ToS or Yggdrasill's spandex. I wouldn't want the spandex...**_

"What I'm asking you," he declared, "is if you would join the Renegades."

Whatever she was expecting, it wasn't that. She gaped, unable even to collect her thoughts enough to consider what he was saying. She didn't get the time.

A harsh knock at the door sent her heart lurching against the walls of her chest.

She looked over to Yuan, panic evident in her eyes. Panic because she had no idea what was going on, who this man in front of her even was anymore. Panic because here was another unknown to throw her into turmoil. And in Cruxis, everything was dangerous, uncertainties even more so.

The green eyes before hers displayed shock too. Yuan stood immediately, so silently that her ears didn't even pick up the sound. Then he nodded once and mouthed, "Go."

She rose from the table herself, her heartbeat even louder to her ears than the sound of her chair scraping against the floor. Yuan disappeared into her bathroom and out of sight.

A thousand scenarios sped through her head, the most prominent warning her that this could've been a test by Lord Yggdrasill to see if she was loyal and she had failed it by letting her former superior continue. She hoped it wasn't true. She could always lie, but Yuan was always so sincere. He couldn't have been lying.

And if he wasn't then there was that fear of discovery, not for her because she hadn't answered, hadn't said anything. She would say that she had no involvement, that she was merely gathering information. But she was afraid, not for herself for once, but for Yuan, because she didn't want him to be punished or killed. She didn't know what to think. She knew he was a traitor; what he was doing was treason at the very least. But at the same time, he was doing it for the right reasons, the same reasons as Lord Yggdrasill and herself.

And who was to tell her which way was right or wrong? Who was to say that Yuan was a bad person? Who was to say he wouldn't return to the right path – Lord Yggdrasill's? Who was to say that she was right to think such things? She didn't know and she didn't know if that thought was terrifying or exhilarating or if it was a thought just like any other.

"Yes?" she beckoned coldly, opening her door in the same way she had for Yuan.

Only, this time, nobody pushed through it. There was just an empty voice relaying, "Lady Pronyma, Lord Yggdrasill requires your presence."

Pronyma gasped, her heart galloping even faster. It was late. Her day was over. She had already reported to her leader that day. This didn't make any sense. But then, today, nothing had made any sense. She let the door open wider and saw two lifeless beings still standing there, spears in hand, awaiting a reply.

"I will get dressed and report to him presently," she told them.

"You will not," one of them disagreed.

Pronyma raised one eyebrow.

"Lord Yggdrasill requests your presence immediately," the other stated monotonously. "He has issued a direct order that we are to take you to him now."

"Lord Yggdrasill would not wish for me to present myself to him semi-clothed," she maintained, her voice reaching dangerous undertones. "Allow me to first make myself presentable to him."

"Denied," the lifeless being retorted.

She opened her mouth to protest hotly, her hands coming to rest on her hips. These lifeless beings were beneath her. It didn't matter that they were the so-called ultimate beings or that she did not actually have any power to issue non-programmed orders to them. She was not letting these shells of people boss her around.

The furious rebuttal was cut off into a strangled shriek as they lunged forwards and unexpectedly grabbed her, dragging her away from her open door and closer to their cold commander. Their grip was tight. She struggled but to no avail. She cursed her lack of physical strength. She couldn't break free without killing the beings and their leader would surely punish her harshly for such an offense. Besides, she had to concentrate to be able to cast but she could not while they were handling her so roughly. In her entire career within Cruxis, she had never felt as humiliated.

They dragged her all the way to the throne room in Vinheim. They didn't even leave her at the door, instead increasing their grip on her to a level that made her gasp while the great doors swung open. Then they threw her to the floor at Lord Yggdrasill's feet and departed without a single word. Her face burned blazing red with shame and embarrassment.

"Pronyma," he acknowledged, his tone colder than hers had ever been.

She pulled herself up to her knees, looking up at her great leader through the green curtain created by her hair.

"Lord Yggdrasill," she responded, inclining her head respectfully.

She stood, brushing back her hair to see his formidable figure standing proudly with his back to her. His blond hair seemed almost like liquid gold pouring down his back, highlighted by the pristine white of his outfit and the complementary gold that adorned it. He was ethereal as always. He was a hero. He was the hero. Mithos the hero. Looking at him, she didn't know how she could ever doubt him, how she could ever have even considered that Yuan way was not bad for going behind his back. He was wonderful.

And then he spoke. "Pronyma, I have an assignment for you."

He seemed to almost snap the words, like he was inwardly seething. Pronyma almost flinched. She hadn't done anything to warrant his ire, she told herself. She hoped she hadn't.

He continued, icy fury radiating from his body and bleeding through his voice, "It is a task I originally gave to Yuan but years have gone by without any useful results. Since Yuan has completely and utterly failed to give me anything at all that I asked for," he spat, "I am giving this assignment to you. I want you to find the leader of the Renegades and if you can, I want you to kill him. I want the Renegades gone. I want them dead. All of them! I want them to suffer like they've made me suffer!"

His voice had become progressively louder, each word punctuated with more venom than the last. His fists had clenched and Pronyma swore she heard a click. At his last sentence, he spun to face her so that she could clearly see the hatred and rage that consumed him, distorting his magnificent face into a grotesque mask. It took all of her willpower not to back away, not to flinch as his wild eyes rounded on her. And even then, her eyes were wide with fear she could not suppress.

This was not a man she wanted to cross. In fact, she wasn't sure he was a man at all. A man could not fill her with such terror. A man couldn't send such ferocious chills down her spine, icy hands that clamped down on her and twisted her insides. A man did not exude such awe inspiring power which suffocated her like he might choose to simply wipe her from existence at the slightest provocation.

But even as she stared, unable to tear her eyes away from him, his own eyes widened to echo hers and he was walking towards her. He stopped less than a foot from her, close enough for her notice that he really was taller than her, that it wasn't simply his presence that made him seem that way, close enough to take in the minor details and delicate features that completed his face.

Said face seemed surprised, almost as though all his anger had been doused out of him. He simply stared into her, not at her but through her like he wasn't seeing her at all, his green eyes full of emotions, not only the glimmer of his forgotten rage but pain and sorrow. Those eyes seemed soft.

Then he lifted his hand slowly, carefully, like the slightest wrong move could break whatever spell wove around them. Pronyma shivered. Her heart was beating so furiously, so loudly that she couldn't feel the eerie silence that hung in the air like the calm before a great storm. She was mesmerised by her leader's soft, pale hand as it rose to stroke her face.

He had never seemed so accessible, so real to her as he did then. The corners of his lips quirked upwards in a smile, a real smile not the cold sneer of command she had only ever seen, a loving smile. And that was when she saw it clearly. How could she ever even have thought she could think he wouldn't care for the traitor's child, that he could make mistakes? He truly was wonderful, a magnificent person, and he was real. He wasn't a fake idol. He was a real man and he did understand love and he could see the good in the world as well as the bad. She could see it as clearly as a summer day in his eyes right now.

She would never doubt him again. He was her leader and she was his subordinate. She would do whatever it would take to stay by his side. She would even use Yuan to please him. After all, he surely was nothing compared to their leader. He ought to have known better. He was a traitor just like that human, the one that her lord had so graciously accepted back into his wonderful new world. She wasn't. Pronyma was everything Lord Yggdrasill needed and she was going to make sure he came to know it.

His hand, which had lingered on her cheek, traced her cheekbone lightly then moved to tilt her chin up towards him, to angle her face so their eyes were parallel. Then he leaned in to her, throwing and arm around her, pulling her into him, into an almost desperate, rough embrace.

"So close," he breathed into her ear, his warm breath tickling her, spreading a tingling sensation down her neck.

Pronyma gasped. And the spell shattered.

He flinched, shoving her away from him. She staggered backwards but stayed on her feet, staring questioningly at her leader, uncertain.

"M-my lord?" she stuttered. What had she done? She was following his will, surely, she had just been following his will? What was punishable about that? Did he know? Had Yuan's proposition been a test? Would he call for her to explain her actions?

His porcelain face cracked, breaking out of the shock that had dominated both their expressions, and now it was twisting back into rage. He crossed the short space that now existed between them but hadn't mere moments ago and shouldn't in this way in two short strides.

"Don't question me!" he roared, raising a hand as if to strike her.

It happened in seconds. She stumbled, falling backwards onto her hip. A crash reverberated from the walls. Yggdrasill froze, his hand caught centimetres short of where her face had been a second ago. Pronyma turned her eyes away, focussing on picking herself up, focussing on not thinking about this yet, not trying to make sense of this situation, just hauling herself onto her elbows then onto her knees.

When she looked up he was kneeling beside her, concern shining from his eyes. He reached for her again, this time brushing the hair back from her face gently without the slightest trace of what she had thought he was about to do. Unless that was a test too. Unless that was the real test. But what kind of a test was that? It was pointless. It wasn't about seeing through disguises; it was more like deciphering the fragmented thoughts of a madman and Lord Yggdrasill was her leader – he was certainly not a madman.

"Are you alright?" he asked worriedly, his hand retreating back to its partner in his lap.

Pronyma held the gaze that studied her, looking for injuries. The concern was genuine, she was sure of it, but so had the fury been. What was genuine and what wasn't? Or was he really that complicated?

"Y-yes, my lord," she gabbled, still searching him for any signs of another instant mood change.

His face closed off and the rage returned to his eyes. But this time, instead of blazing into wild flames and violence, it simply simmered into an undertone of cold hatred.

"Good," he said, emotionlessly, rising from the floor fluidly with the ease, power and threat of a predator.

He wandered away, his back to her, his eyes on the back wall like he wasn't seeing that either, in the same way he hadn't seen her earlier. "I want you to start work on your new assignment tomorrow and you will report back to me in one month unless it is urgent or I summon you. Understood?"

"Yes, my lord," she answered quickly, scrambling to her feet as fast as she could despite the dull throb of pain this incited.

"Leave," he hissed icily.

Pronyma had never been so glad to leave him. She didn't even want to think about him. All she wanted was to find her bed and sleep until she had forgotten all about Yuan's revelation and her new assignment, to when Lord Yggdrasill was her amazing, if cold, leader and Yuan was simply her former, and more approachable, superior.

She didn't want to know all that she now knew about them. She didn't even want the ideas to be in her head. She felt like she didn't know anything anymore. She felt like her entire world, because Cruxis was her world now and there was nothing left for her on the surface, had been ripped apart while she strained to hold it together. And the pieces were slipping from her fingers and flying into the abyss.

Lord Yggdrasill had been going to hit her. She didn't think she could believe it. He was her hero. She had done nothing to warrant such a punishment, nothing he was aware of anyway. All she had done was to go along with whatever he wanted with her. That part of her, the part of her that revelled in his contact, in his very presence, screamed that it wasn't true, that it couldn't be true because Lord Yggdrasill would never do such a thing. He was the hero of the half-elves. He was even helping humans by prolonging the survival of their world. He was testing her. It was all a test. She knew it. It didn't matter that she couldn't understand it because she couldn't understand a wonderful being like Lord Yggdrasill. She would just have to try harder. She would just have to ensure she would understand and pass the test next time.

But the other part of her was getting louder. It was getting stronger now. It had been gaining in strength every time she closed her eyes and saw Yuan sitting in the wreckage caused by the Desians, singing softly to that inferior being, heard his sincere voice urging her to remember his advice, ever since the incident outside Iselia. It urged her to see the truth, to remember the blue-haired man and how he had helped her, to remember the tone his voice took on whenever Lord Yggdrasill was mentioned. To remember that everyone made mistakes and that even Lord Yggdrasill had bad days and needed someone to protect him, if just from himself.

She didn't know what to do. She just didn't know. And she didn't care that she didn't know anymore. All she wanted was to sleep.

She limped exhaustedly back to her chambers, sliding gratefully through the door, into her domain, where everything was as she left it, as she wanted it and expected it to be.

"What was it, Pronyma?" a calm voice enquired.

Yuan. He was still here. He was leaning against the door frame that connected her main room to her bathroom, watching her expectantly with his calculating green eyes. And suddenly, Pronyma didn't know what to do or what to say. She liked Yuan, she did. She respected him. But she idolised Lord Yggdrasill. And he was a traitor to her lord. To tell him would be treason. But what could she say?

Nothing. She'd say nothing.

She limped over to her table, leaning on it as she moved to face the man who was still technically superior to her. He was frowning.

"You're injured," he observed. "Yggdrasill was in a foul mood then. I thought as much when he sent for you."

"Lord Yggdrasill wasn't-" Pronyma began, immediately jumping to defend her lord from this traitor, forgetting about preserving her manner and her reputation, only to fall short when she realised that she couldn't deny it; it was true.

His frown deepened, his eyes hardening, before his face smoothed out into an emotionless mask. He pushed himself away from the door frame, looking strangely more imposing and powerful now he was standing with correct posture. He surveyed her bristling body one more time before nodding curtly and striding to the door.

"I should leave you to your sleep," he stated coldly, turning his back to her.

He was shutting her out and as much as she had hoped this problem would just go away, as much as she had hoped that she could forget about him revealing his secret to her, she found that she didn't want him to go like this. She didn't want him to cut her out.

"Wait!" she cried as his fingers closed around the door handle.

He paused, looking over his shoulder at her with one eyebrow raised questioningly. Part of her felt relief. Part of her felt the pressure his gaze was subjecting her to. Part of her cursed herself for stopping him.

Now she had to think of something to say. She couldn't tell him about Lord Yggdrasill's assignment; it would be breaking his trust, turning into the enemy herself. But at the same time, she didn't want to go back to a time when her former immediate superior didn't acknowledge her at all except with contempt, ridiculous and absurd as it was. She was just so exhausted.

Logically, she had to tell him something; if she declined his offer so obviously, she would still know he was involved in the Renegades and she didn't doubt that this would make her a threat to him. He would be wary of her. If she didn't blackmail him with it at the very least, he would assume she would tell Lord Yggdrasill. He would most likely assume this anyway. She was a threat. That meant she would have to go, whether by demotion or by death, and that did not sit well with her. So logically she had to do something. She had to make him think she wasn't a threat.

She had to join the Renegades. She would have to convince him that she would be not only his spy but his confidant. She could use him. Through him, she could find out all there was to know about the Renegades and complete her assignment.

"Lord Yuan," she began, "I..."

The thought knocked her back like a granite block. Her assignment wasn't only to expose the Renegades and their leader but to kill them, every last one if them if she could, and she intended to impress Lord Yggdrasill. That would include killing him. She would have to kill the man who had taught her almost all she knew, who had recommended her for this position and got her here in the first place, with her own hands, by her own will. She would have to kill Yuan.

Suddenly she felt like she was drowning.

It must have shown on her face; Yuan turned to face her fully, relinquishing his hold on the door handle to walk over to where she all but slumped on her table. He sighed as he reached her and she found herself captured by his tired green eyes.

She had been so wrapped up in how stressed and tired she was that she hadn't spared a thought for the man who stood regarding her now. He was spending every second he could watching over the traitor while doing his work for Cruxis, dealing with her and performing his role among the Renegades at the same time.

And she felt pity for him? No, of course she didn't. It was his fault he had so much work to do; nobody had forced him to become a Renegade and betray her lord. In fact it served him right! She shouldn't be thinking like this. He was a traitor! She shouldn't be afraid to kill him. It shouldn't make her stomach sink and twist and a bad taste to tangle in her throat. She should feel proud that she was the one who would eliminate such a threat to Lord Yggdrasill's dream, to her dream, to everyone's dream. He deserved to die for his betrayal.

He sighed. "Pronyma? Are you sure you're alright?"

Didn't he?

She looked up, directly into his eyes and saw the concern amidst the exhaustion. He had seen too much, done too much, lived too much. He looked as beaten down by the world as she did when she studied his eyes. He probably wanted nothing more than to curl up in his bed and sleep until the world was right, just like she did. Only unlike her, he was old enough that he had been struggling in this way for much longer than she had. Yet he hadn't given up. He had strayed from the right path but he cared. He still cared.

She could see it in his eyes. He was frowning now. She'd been staring for too long. He reached out with one hand. An image flashed in front of her eyes of a similar hand, similar yet different, reaching up tenderly and then the same hand cutting through the air towards her. She flinched.

Yuan wasn't fazed by it. He pressed his hand firmly to her forehead for a few seconds, checking her temperature while his eyes flicked between each of her own, studying them in turn until he pulled back, removing his hand and taking a step backwards, satisfied.

"I'm fine," she managed, finally. "I'm fine. I just..."

He was watching her more intently now and not for the first time, she found herself fighting not to squirm under his scrutiny. She had to tell him. She would just have to tell him and hope he believed her.

"Lord Yuan, I..." She took a long breath. This was it. This was her last chance to back out. This was a once in a lifetime opportunity. It was now or never. "I'll join."

One of Yuan's eyebrows rose. He stared into her a few seconds longer than was really necessary but she resisted the urge to look away or fidget in her seat. She was exhausted; she had been knocked down today by so many things, but she would bounce back. She had always promised herself, even when she was a free half-elf struggling to keep her head above the water, she had always promised herself that she would meet every challenge head on, that she wouldn't give up and that she would always, always bounce back.

So she would bounce back. She had decided her course of action and this was it. Now or never, all or nothing. She would follow this course until she had what she wanted. She met Yuan's challenging eyes directly with her own determined ones.

His face slowly broke into a smile.

"I'll join the Renegades."

**AN: Yep, I know I took a gamble with Yggdrasill and that some of you will slate me for making him a little too crazy but rest assured that his really weird behaviour with Pronyma in this chapter will be explained later on. Some of you will probably be able to guess why he reacts to her as he did now before I reveal it. But if you have any suggestions I'll still take them into account.**

**I just realised, this is actually the first time I've ever written Yggdrasill... And I made him insane...**

**But we are now done with Chapter 2 Part 2 that is now chapter 3. I have kind of rushed this so it will probably be worse than usual for typos and things that don't make sense.**

**Sooo, as usual, I am more than up for some constructive criticism. If I don't know what's wrong I can't improve it. Even if it sounds silly to you or you just think that a particular bit 'feels wrong', it's useful to know so I can look at it. And I always take reviews into account.**

**And since I'm finding a lot of people don't, I feel I should say this: I accept anonymous reviews.**

**Anyway, please tell me what you think and thanks for reading this far! You guys are awesome! ^_^**

**~ThePurpleRose**


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